Sunday, December 2, 2012 K.ickers E.ver R.eliably S.olid?

Another intra-divisional game for the 49ers, another egg laid all over. What is this brain lock the team has against peforming well for too many weeks in a row? After taking huge steps forward in beating down the Bears and dominating the Saints, here we go stepping backwards again against the Rams. And this time, St. Louis was without Amendola to run circles around the 49er secondary. Not a good look.

Since we've hit December, I will present my Christmas wish list for the 49ers:

* Delanie Walker: Good hands tutoring sessions. What are these stone metacarpals protruding from Walker's wrists? How can someone be so prone to dropsy at all the wrong moments? Can Michael Crabtree (great hands) and Vernon Davis (reliable hands) work with this guy?

* David Akers: a time machine. For this 2012 version of Akers to occupy the same physical space as the 2011 Akers is downright insulting. There've been whispers of a hip ailment of some sort. There must be. Anything else outside of injury doesn't add up. We might have been 4-12 last year (as opposed to 13-3) with this version of Akers. As I told one friend, FGs have ceased to be a strategic option. They are, for the time being, an absolute last resort.

* Colin Kaepernick: A Swiss timepiece. It's great that the kid is so willing, and seemingly adept at, reading defenses at the line and changing plays accordingly...but he can he do it with a little more than 5 seconds left on the play clock? We are guaranteed at least 2-3 reading-defense timeouts and 1-2 delay-of-game penalties per game. At least get out of the huddle faster to give him a precious few more seconds to do his thing.

* The whole team: Discipline. False starts and neutral-zone infractions. Unsportsmanlike-penalty-earning extra-cirricular kicks and head-slaps. Illegal motions. Can we stop with the dumb play-killing penalties already?

* Aldon Smith: a choreographer. When you're about to set a new record for sacks, you need your very own dance to celebrate the record-breaking and all future sacks. Actually, I'm joking. Seriously. Please don't invite any excessive-celebration yellow flags. A humongous yellow flag is likely going to torture me in my dreams tonight. But let's get Smith a few more sacks to solidify that most career sacks for a sophomore player record.

* Fans: Muzzels and non-functional keyboards. I can't take any more of the Smith/Kaepernick comments and arguments.

- J

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